“What’s a Gumbo Machine?” and Other Internet Mysteries
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The internet is a weird place, y'all. The robots are taking over and there isn't much we can do about it. Have you tried replying to an email lately? You almost don't have to do anything now that Google and Microsoft are able to predict how you'll reply. It's kind of creepy, but that's progress for you.
Not only do they know how you're likely to respond to that email from your boss asking you to work through the weekend again ("Sure, that'd be great!"), but Amazon's little algorithmic helpers are also able to translate just about any crazy thing you type into the search bar.
For example, I typed in gumbo the other day, and Amazon suggested I allow it to autocomplete my search by adding machine before hitting enter. I wasn't sure what a gumbo machine would even look like, so I went ahead and searched for one out of morbid curiosity.
I was not disappointed.
Yep, that's what a gumbo machine looks like. Kids love them! It dispenses one gumbo per penny, which is a bargain any way you look at it. If you want to order your very own, you can click here.
Don't forget to pick up a bag of gumbos!
Not content to settle for gumbo machines, I started typing other misspellings and misheard words into the search box to see what would happen.
Magical things, you guys.
Magical things happened.
Anybody need a sports braw? Because I can hook you up. Available in a dizzying multitude of colors and styles, Amazon has a braw to fit any occasion!
Nothing beats a warm benyay for dessert after polishing off a big bowl of authentic Louisiana gumballs.
A little-known fact about the hit sitcom, Friends, was that Chandler Bing secretly made his fortune from marketing a successful line of luxury jewelry to other self-centered twenty-somethings living in the crazy dot-com heyday of the mid-'90s. (Which explains how he was able to afford his impossibly large New York apartment.)
AND DO HE SAUSAGE
Before putting your hard-earned pennies into the nearest gumbo machine for some chicken and sausage gumballs, check to make sure it's using authentic Louisiana And Do He sausage.
And Do He is a spicy smoked pork sausage featured heavily in Cajun and Creole cooking. You know, in case you were wondering.